The Ugly Beautifulness of Ministry

I remember when I first started in ministry. I had lots of naysayers, including people in my family. I was not the one expected to commit to full time ministry. That job was reserved for my much more “religious” brother who didn't commit as many sins as I did. Working in children's ministry was one of the only places in my life that made any sense at the time. Besides being a mom, it was the only thing that came natural and that I was good at.

Regardless of the comments from the doubters, I knew it was where I needed to be. But it didn't come without consequence or mistakes. I was so overwhelmed at that time in my life, trying to balance it all and be it all for Jesus that I lost a really great friend, and unfortunately hurt her in the process. I gave up opportunities to work elsewhere making more money, which as a single mom I needed.

No longer was I, or am I, able to make “gut” or logical decisions about my future. Every move I make or don't make involves prayer and more prayer and wise counsel, and often times tears. Me being in ministry has put my entire family in frustrating positions and financial difficulties.

Ha! I'm obviously not the salesman of the year when it comes to convincing you that ministry is awesome! Oh but it is! All of those sacrifices and struggles are worth it when you hear a teenager pray for the first time, or a kid run up to you and hug your leg on Sunday morning. When the kids in the neighborhood want to know when you will start a Bible study for them, and when teenagers don't want to move because youth group is so important to them. Then there are the proclaimed atheists who now know this Jesus that adores them. And the addicts who know that Jesus is the only answer.

It is just that in times like these, when me and my husband must make a hard decision where we don't seem to win either way, it is so hard not to feel guilty. Ministry is not just a sacrifice for me, but for my husband, for my children. I am so incredibly grateful that the sacrifice Jesus made was enough for my family to be 'all in.' But it is hard to swallow that in order for me to pursue what Jesus has for me, my husband must take a second job to support our family or work countless hours of overtime.

Ministry has these moments when you and your family must come together, completely unified, with faith in God that He will make all things right. It is ugly and beautiful all at once.

Don't give up.

What are some sacrifices you've made for ministry? Comment and let me know.

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5 thoughts on “The Ugly Beautifulness of Ministry

  1. Your post could not come at a better time. I am in the midst of evaluated my life. There are so many ministry opportunities that I want to make sure I am where God wants me. At times I want to give up – but am glad I never do. The most sacrifices I have made have been to myself and to my family. I have lost out on quiet restful time and at times have been to busy for my family, but both are lessons are learned and the mature I am in my faith the more I have learned to balance things.

    1. Patty, thank you for assuring me that I am not crazy! :). One thing I have learned and the hard way no doubt is that just because I can doesn’t mean I should. Praying for you today!!

      1. so true! Thanks for the prayers. I am confident that God will guide me and help me sort things out. Your article confirmed that for me!

  2. This spoke to my heart so much! I feel the exact same way so often, and you just put it into perfect words. I especially love the last few paragraphs. 🙂 Glad I found your blog. God bless!

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