Boys Will Be Boys, Except When They’re Girls

Tolerance. This is the buzzword that looms and makes my job so much harder. We are living in a world of gray that refuses to accept a standard and allows whatever feels right, looks right, seems right, without regard for any such thing as absolute truth. I would say the lines are getting fuzzy, but it seems lines no longer exist.

This is particularly true in regards to male and female. I remember the year I bought Cody a baby doll for Christmas. He would be as mortified at you knowing this as much my husband was that I encouraged it. He wanted a baby, he wanted to be a dad. THAT I could not discourage. So I bought him a doll, and he played daddy with it for about two minutes and then the thrill was gone.

He didn’t want the doll because he wanted to be a girl, he wanted the doll because he wanted to explore the role of a dad, the role of being a man. But now, things have changed….

Now, our world is promoting genderless-ness. As if there are no innate differences in how we were created. But we ARE different. Scientists don’t disagree–well at least I don’t think they do. I am pretty sure they can tell you all the differences between our anatomy and physiology. And the differences would be clearly defined, no fuzzy lines. Boys have these parts, girls have those. Boys have this kind of hormone, girls have allllll of these kinds of hormones. It’s true. It’s absolute.

In the Bible, our gender differences are absolute. Men-work. Women-have babies. Really, it says that. It also says that God created us in whichever way he created us– either as a woman or man. He never makes a mistake. He never says, “oops, I accidently put a woman in a man’s body or vice versa.”

So now that I’ve covered Science AND the Bible: why is our world okay with removing the boundaries that clearly define the differences between male and female? And more so, why is it shameful to be accepting of our genders as beautiful & exciting, part of a bigger vision that is unfathomable?

I read an article this morning about a son we “refused” (that’s a whole other article) to wear anything but dresses, so his dad decided to wear dresses with him. I read a children’s book that encourages demasculation by referring to her son as a princess boy. I’ve seen young girls so terribly ashamed of their bodies and being feminine that they pile on layers and layers of clothes to cover themselves, I had a 9 year old girl so ashamed of herself that she changed her name to something that “sounded like a boy” so no one would know she was a girl.

Parents–STOP. I implore you. Instead of erasing the lines that clearly define us as humans created beautifully, with complexity and purpose, encourage your boys to embrace their roles as leaders and warriors, fighting for what they believe in and rolling up their sleeves to get the work done. Show your girls the beauty within themselves without having to use their bodies to gain approval or hide their bodies in utter shame. Allow both of them to see how their genders contribute to the workings of this system we call humanity. Please, let your boys be boys and your girls be girls. You will be sorry if you don’t.



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