Blog Archives
So I’m Concocting This Plan….
My husband doesn’t know it, but I’ve been sitting in front of the TV all morning watching the terrible images of the Oklahoma Tornado. I can’t imagine wondering if I will ever find my child buried beneath the rubble. I can’t imagine it all being stripped from me, in an unexpected moment because of wind and rain. I can’t imagine… Did you know that the winds were so fierce they stripped the bark off of trees. But the trees were left standing–rooted. Being rooted in Christ, I feel like our family is that tree, and no matter what we’ve been through, we are still standing. And because of that, we have to do something.
Everything in me is ready to pack and start the 20 hour drive to Moore, OK. But every doubt and question and reason not to is flooding my head. My attachment to stuff and my worry about money and bills keeps my feet planted. And for the record: I HATE IT!
This can’t be how Jesus intends for us to live our lives. Unable to help, to reach out to those in need, because of stuff. I can’t imagine He desired for us to be so comfortable that it hinders, and pretty much enables us to feed the poor, help the needy, love the broken. More and more I resent this life I’ve created for myself and my kids. This life of stuff and materialism. This world of work hard at a job you may or may not like, that may or may not be your God given gifts to buy more stuff, and bigger houses, that you absolutely do not need…that with a little wind and rain, can be taken in moments.
So I’m concocting this plan…to leave. I believe that going to Oklahoma could change our family, our lives, and my marriage. I believe that going to Oklahoma will ignite a passion for people in my children. I believe that going to Oklahoma will deepen my families faith in a way that we will never be able to be at this place again. I believe going to Oklahoma will further the kingdom, and help a family believe in Jesus who never knew Him before. I believe I want to go…I believe we need to go. In order to go, I’m going to need to raise the money to prove to my slumbering husband how serious I am. I am praying that God is speaking to him in his dreams right now, and I’m praying that by the time he wakes up my plan will be in full swing, and he will be unable to say No.
Will you donate? I don’t need pledges, I need the cash! Can you give? Will you give? I’m thinking we would need anywhere from $1500-$2000 to stay a week, have money for gas and food and be able to freely give to those in need. I will be taking photos and documenting our trip, so you know I’m not trying to swindle you! Help me get my plan in motion, and so I can be completely convincing when my husband awakens. I don’t think my blue eyes alone are going to get me this one.
A Lion Is Roaring, Can You Hear It Now?
“The LORD roars from Zion…” Amos 1:2
When I was a single mom, I yelled lots. My poor babies had to deal with an emotionally charged, utterly exhausted parent who had no idea what she was doing. Somehow I thought if I shouted my requests they would be heard and my requests would be granted. There are times still I don’t feel heard and my voice reaches an octave I’m pretty much embarrassed to admit. The reality was, the more I yelled the more I was ignored.
Almost like the story of the little boy who cried wolf. He cried so often about nothing in particular, just to gain attention, that eventually everyone disregarded his real need.
Amos announces from who the prophecy came, the LORD. And the LORD comes roaring. The irony in this is that Amos was a shepherd. He was most likely a man of few words, a man mild in mannerism. He also understood the importance of the lions roar.
When a lion enters, he announces it’s presence. With a deep sound, repeating several times and traveling up to 5 miles, this animal shows everyone he is certainly king. Similarly, God roars from Zion, making his presence known, showing his authority.
Ironically, most kids struggle with the idea of authority. Weekly I see disrespect, dishonor and inability to submit to adults a common problem with too many kids. As much as I hate to say it, and you hate to admit it, authority problems start in the home. Our roars are too soft, if at all. We parent in fear instead of teaching children to have a healthy fear of our authority, and then ultimately God’s authority over their lives.
Yelling isn’t the answer, I learned the hard way. A roar is not a yell, it is simply an announcement. It is a way to say to your children I am the adult, you are the child. Knowing that someone else has wisdom over us provides a sense of safety. It helps us to operate within boundaries and problem solve. It is no mistake that Amos begins his entire warning to the people of Israel stating how God delivered His message—as a roaring lion.
Are you are roaring lion, establishing your authority?
How can you change this if you need to re-establish yourself as the Lion over your children?
Let’s Talk About: Preacher’s Daughters
Yah, I got sucked in! Preacher’s Daughters is a new show on Lifetime. I’m always interested in how the mainstream interprets the lives of those in ministry. I could definitely tell a bit of “overacting” when the camera got too close. Because just in case you didn’t know, Reality TV is often NOT actually reality. Sorry if I ruined your day ….
I think it’s interesting to see that the families that were picked had ‘real world’ issues. Divorce, teenage pregnancy, disobedience. As a fellow “pastor” (and I use that term loosely) it is refreshing that Christians aren’t made out to be perfect.
I was reminded of walking with a neighbor a few years ago and we were chatting about the kids in the neighborhood. As we passed a house she pointed and said, “Those kids are the worst. Always cussing and acting stupid. And they are even pastors kids.”
Later I walked to my house after dropping her off and wondered if Pastor’s kids had some sort of special DNA or gene that exempted them from temptation and the realities of sin. The world definitely has an expectation on families in ministry to act differently and respond differently to the culture and the natural sinfulness of the world.
But like everyone else, we are only human. We have a heart after God, wanting to do His will and lead people to Him, but we don’t always get it right. And often times our kids are just along for the ride.
I don’t agree with everything on the show. I definitely see the brokenness in the single mom and the way she parents in fear and other parenting struggles where the camera adds ten pounds.
Regardless of our vocation, one with eternal purpose or not, it’s hard to raise kids. Everyone is different and we have become a different person with every child. It is a daily prayer walk of fully relying on God and trusting Him to do His part as we do ours!
You are loved,
Dreams for Sale on the Internet
The last few days I’ve spent ample time with Zac. He’s been home from school with pulmonary junk. So between the million breathing treatments, we’ve watched the Karate Kid at least as many times. Zac loves to punch and kick and flip. So after the millionth time of me asking him to sit down and stop putting himself on the brink of respiratory failure, he settled in with my iPad.
“Mom, how do you spell karate?”
Before I knew it, Zac was on Karate Depot investigating how much black belts cost.
“Mom, can I buy a black belt?”
So being the fantastic, insightful mom I am, I replied with, “A black belt can’t be bought. It must be earned.”
Quickly, Zac was just as insightful, “I am going to earn it–well, I’m going to pretend I did.”
Isn’t that the American way? We want to pretend, or live as if, we have earned something. We want a fantastic marriage, but we don’t want to fight our way through it. We want kids who are well-adjusted and able to handle no matter what comes their way, but we don’t want to impose the boundaries. We want that deep faith in God, but shrug our shoulders at the thought of daily prayer and Bible reading.
All of us on some level want to pretend we’ve earned all the benefits of maturity. We shop at a Karate Depot, or Marriage Depot, or Parenting Depot, hoping to find something that will give us an outward badge of honor–to show the world our amazing-ness. We are willing to pay the $29.95 and even the inflated shipping fees if only it will give us the shortcut.
I wish I could purchase a black belt in writing, and in teenage dating issues, and in church planting, and in marriage. But even if I did, when it came down to the time to battle the enemy, I would lose.
I finished the conversation with my determined child forehead to forehead. I looked him in the eyes and said, “We can’t cheat our way through things. We have to work hard, train, do whatever it takes to get our black belt. Even if it takes 15 years to get it. And that’s not just with Kung Fu. We have to work hard to be whatever it is we dream about. We can’t buy our dreams on the internet.”
He flipped and kicked his way upstairs and came down with his Judo uniform and proudly tied his white belt. The kicking and flipping never stopped, but hopefully he learned–hopefully we have learned–that whatever it is we want to be best in, whatever we want to wear a black belt for, will take doing the hard work!
Happy Friday. You are loved!
Why Nicolas Cage Creeps Me Out
It was a bad case of the Mondays. I spent the day in bed, not feeling well–trying to fight the guilt of not feeling well–trying to force myself to feel better. I even got up and showered, did my hair & make up, but soon after I grabbed all the kids from school, I went right back to bed, fully clothed. I lead a youth group about 20 minutes away on Mondays, so I found a little strength after a pleading prayer and headed out.
After a great night of hanging with amazing kids, I headed home to my own amazing kids… to find this greeting me:
Now what is disturbing to me is that I hate Nicolas Cage. I’m sure he’s a nice person blah blah blah, but as an actor, I think the world of film could do without him. When I see him, or worse hear his voice, I think of the slicked back creepy uncle who walks around with his hand his pocket jingling his “change”. I imagine him with a Marlboro in one hand a luke-warm half drank bottle of beer sitting in front of him while he invites his nieces and nephews who are passing through the kitchen to come and sit on his lap. He just…creeps. me. out.
Now I know there are people out there who think he’s wonderful, artistic, blah blah blah. But I think he’s a creeper. And now thanks to my two teenage children, who will remain unnamed Alyssa and Cody I now have creeper status pics all over my house: My mirror where I sit to put my make up on, the microwave where I cook my food and the computer mouse where I sit typing. He’s freekin’ everywhere.
What I love about this rather disturbing prank is it came from my kids. Our lives get so bogged down–get your homework done, hurry up and eat we have football–don’t make too much noise dad has to work overtime tonight–go to bed—do…-go…-do…-go. Sometimes as families we forget to have fun. Fun and humor is such an important part of your family. If your family doesn’t feel like you can play together, there is a sense of safety that is missing–and it is vital.
We should be able to joke with one another, even pick on each other (within limits) and maybe even once in a while, post creepy pics of your most hated actor all over your house. Simply cause some laughter, connect, and show that you care–in a round about crazy sort of way, a way that shows your kids that you know them, and that even as an adult, you know how to have a little fun. With spring break approaching, now is the time to put down your agendas, and have some fun with your kids.
How have you created an atmosphere of fun in your family? Comment–let me know, I would love to hear from you!
